Children and Conflict Series Part 4

Devaluing (Abusive) Behaviors…

Using Institutions = Threats of punishment from God, courts, police, school, juvenile detention, foster homes, relatives, psych wards.

Isolation = Control access to other parent, siblings, grandparents, friends, etc.

Devaluing (Abusive) Behaviors

Emotional Abuse = Use put downs, name calling & shaming.  Use children as confidants or messengers between parents.  Be inconsistent.

Economic Abuse = Withhold basic needs.  Use money to control behavior.  Misuse family money.  Non-payment of child support.  Use children as economic pawns in divorce.

Threats = Threats of abandonment, suicide, physical harm, confinement, or harm to other loved ones.

Using Adult Privilege = Treat children as possessions or servants.  Punitive, “win at all cost” thinking, deny children input, and disrespectful behaviors (i.e. interrupting).

Intimidation = Instill fear through looks, actions, gestures, property destruction.  Yelling & physical violence toward people and/or pets.

Physical Violence = Pinching, hitting, kicking, pushing, twisting arms, choking, etc.  Sexual touching or kissing, seeing children’s behavior as sexual, and incest.

Source:    Adapted from Domestic Abuse Intervention Project –Duluth

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