Divorce mediation is recommended by the court system over a court battle (called litigation). If you are a Minnesota couple that has made the decision to use mediation for divorce, here are 5 tips that can help you get the process started:
1. Create detailed lists: So, one large part of the mediation process is determining how to fairly split all of the property that you share. This includes all of your assets, your home, any rental properties, your vehicles, furniture, jewelry, and basically anything else that you purchased during your marriage. Before you even have your first meeting with your mediator, you can prepare by creating a detailed list of these items and trying to assign a value to them. You should also be prepared to bring extensive financial documentation including information on income, debt, retirement accounts, investments, etc.
2. Be open minded: While litigation is based on a win/lose mindset, mediation is based on cooperation. Despite your long history of potential conflict with your spouse, you should be ready to find ways to compromise during the mediation process and keep an open mind about the items that you will be focused on including dividing property, parenting time/custody and spousal and/or child support.
3. Think about your priorities: Before you attend your first mediation session, make a list of your priorities, or anything that is critically important to you for the negotiation. These may be things that have sentimental value to you. Be ready for your ex to also have a similar list. Very often this can be a way to start the negotiation with a win, so both parties can keep something important to them.
4. Practice clear communication: When you enter into a mediated negotiation it is important to be clear and unemotional in your communication. You may feel lingering anger, sadness and other emotion – that is perfectly normal, but maintaining a clear and business-like approach to the process will help you navigate it successfully.
5. Look forward: Divorce is difficult, and it is often the culmination of many months or years of difficult times. Rather than focusing on the pain of your past, mediation can help you focus on the possibilities of the future.
Mediation is a highly effective tool to navigate the divorce process with less conflict and with less of a financial burden. AMS Mediation offers high quality mediation services for families in the Minnesota area. We offer in person mediation sessions or online sessions, depending on your needs and preferences. For more information, give us a call at 952-252-1492 to schedule a free consultation.
