Key Truths about Divorce:

  1. Regardless of process, most divorce cases settle before going to trial; a significant number never see the inside of a courtroom.
  2. You are the expert in your life.
  3. You are capable of making fair and reasonable decisions about your future.
  4. You have choices when deciding how to proceed with you divorce.
  5. Self-determined agreements yield better results than imposed outcomes.

Steps for Success during Divorce

  1. Thoughtfully consider how you want your future to unfold in the short and long term.
  2. Educate yourself about different methods of divorce settlement.
  3. Carefully interview professionals (attorneys, mediators, evaluators,, etc.) prior to retaining their services.
  4. Select a process that supports and encourages self-determination, provides timely resolution and conserves financial resources.
  5. Hire professionals who understand and will respect your needs and preferences including the needs and long-term well-being of your children.
  6. Be actively involved in seeking self-determined outcomes and be fully engaged with your professionals; listen to their guidance but remember, this is your life and you are the one who has to live with the outcomes.
  7. Understand all of the associated costs of a course of action before implementing it. Consider benefits (gains) compared to cost (losses), stress, as well as negative effects on the children and/or parenting.
  8. Speak up and address your concerns if you feel the process is not fulfilling your needs or is out of control.
  9. Your professionals work for you. If after addressing your concerns with them directly, they are not responding to your needs or providing the type of service you want, hire another professional.

Written by Amber M. Serwat, MA for Christine Clifford and published in her book: The Clue Phone’s Ringing…it’s For You!

For information about divorce mediation services and Parents Forever Classes please contact Amber at or by phone at 952.252.1492